Decluttering – Meeting Resistance

Dear Husband, Ray, and I worked together for an hour and twenty minutes today.  We emptied 3 boxes that are now ready for future use; Ray took two large trash bags out to the dumpster.  We reviewed the contents of two boxes and repacked the items we wanted to keep for our upcoming move. 

Today was our third session this week.  I am feeling more and more successful after each day’s accomplishments; but I think DH is running out of energy and enthusiasm for the project.  We’ve only worked together three days out of the five this week and he already told me he doesn’t want to work tomorrow.  That’s a little bit of a letdown for me.
 
I see 1,000 square feet of clutter that needs to be reviewed, evaluated, and in someway gotten rid of or organized into some less chaotic (less like a storage locker) atmosphere.  I see our one hour of working together daily as a means to getting the help I need to accomplishing that goal.  But I am meeting some resistance from him and I’m not sure why.  Maybe he resents that it’s mostly my accumulation and feels I should do it on my own?  Possible?  Probable!
 
Time has taught me that I can’t – or I won’t – do it on my own.  There is a lot of emotional baggage tied to my “stuff”.  We don’t need to go through all that right now; just suffice it to say that I am becoming aware of that emotional tie and am trying to break that attachment so I can put my relationship with “things” in proper perspective and start having a “real life”.
 
Giving credit where it is due, if it weren’t for Ray, I’d probably be one of those reclusive “stuffers” or “hoarders” that has a six-inch path meandering through piles in the apartment.  Part of the reason we undertook this project is because upon retirement Ray suggested we move back to the Mid-West to be closer to friends and family.  I loved that idea but there was no way we wanted to rent another huge truck and trailer.  Since Coronavirus our plans are up in the air; but it’s still a good time to declutter.
 
Ray has urged me for years to get rid of this “stuff”; for years my answer was no.  Then I started realizing I had too much “stuff”; and I had a problem letting go of “things” so I couldn’t do it alone (I need some help).  DH offered help on occasion, I usually declined.  I finally accepted his offer.  Now he is resistant, argumentative, and a little grumpy about the chaos that comes before the calm when you start the decluttering process.
 
The clutter is driving him crazy, but the decluttering process is driving him crazy too.  His crazy is making me crazy and the tension is mounting; and sadly, we are still in the very early stages of this process, so I’m sure it’s going to get worse before it gets better.  I’m walking a really thin line right now.
 
Dear Lord, please give me the motivation to keep moving forward in this decluttering process (with or without Ray’s help).  Help me to stay calm, positive and energized; help me to control my anxiety, depression, and behavior in this highly emotional and physically draining situation.
 
We’ll talk again soon!
 
MarySmiles ;-)


Location: Dover, DE 19904, USA

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I hope this post was a blessing to you and that you found something to help you in your daily walk with Christ. Would you please take a moment and share something that makes your home run more smoothly and aids you in your Walk with Christ? MarySmiles ;-)

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